Monday, March 15, 2010

OK, who peed in my NCAA pool?




Oh yes, the NCAA tournament is upon us. (I only know this because I listen to Sports Radio to keep my man card - it's one of the conditions of my parole after losing said card).

And millions upon millions of dollars will be wagered, not in Vegas but in offices all over America - with some entry fees well above the $100 level - with winnings in the thousands. Thus, the weeks leading up to the beginning of the tournament, people will be pouring over stats, looking over numbers, to ensure they will be the winner - and rightly so with so much on the line.

This means it's also time thousands of dollars of copy paper to be wasted on the "brackets" that will printed, (mostly on corporate copiers, pretty much without the permission of employers), handed-out and filled-out by those who will enter their office pool.
Example only. To be used for entertainment purposes only, yeh right.
And, while most of the people will use the vast research they have compiled over the past season and weeks leading up to the big games, I will employ my own, secret, but highly successful strategy - a strategy that has already led me to victory in the one time I was forced to enter this stupid ritual.

For those who are not as savvy as I about such sporting traditions, the far left and far right brackets are filled out with the teams that are matched up against each other in what is called the, "First Round". The reason I know this is because the first year I entered I mistakingly filled out the far left and right brackets with my own match-ups - and was severely reprimanded - picky picky.

But back to my super-duper secret pool-winning strategy.

It a complicated animal and mascot prediction model. For instance, in a fight to the death, what would win, this cute, adorable furry Husky puppy...

Look how cute, how cute are you, how cute, how cute are you?
...or this bloody thirsty Badger?

GRRRRRRRR!
If you picked the Badger, you are on your way to winning your office pool!

Now, let's move on to mascots.

Who would win? This guy?
Goooooo team!
Or the Michigan State Spartan?

Who's up for bear meat?
If you picked the bear, I'm sorry to say, but stay in the kiddie pool...

One more try.

The Duck
Nice hat
Or the Texas Mascot, Bevo.

How many ducks you think would fit on his horns?
This is a fool-proof system and if you follow it you will surely win your office pool.

So, good luck. And remember, a Trojan beats a Wildcat, a Gopher always loses to a Boilermaker, (who doesn't lose to a Boilermaker, 'cept an Irish Car bomb, but of course that would be a silly, albeit cool nickname), and never ever ever ever bet against any name or mascot that resembles a devil. Devils cheat.

Blindmanszoo.com is not responsible for any decisions made, financial or otherwise, based on information or links provided by Blindmanszoo.com. We advised all reasders to use discretion when viewing our picks and predictions page. Please bet within your means only! If you encounter gambling problems of any kind, please contact the gambling help authorities in your area and please submit all your problems to us via our contact page or our forum, coming soon. We will try to find answers for your questions, but we can not promise that you will like the answers.

1 comment:

  1. Now, that's a strategy! Too bad I don't even know the mascots for each university, so that sounds like I need to do too much research! ha

    ReplyDelete